Clarity Requires Loss

"See yourself as high as you possibly can see yourself... Be delusional... Then you push past that even a little bit and define it, and then number two is like believe it." — J. Cole

This guidance isn't new. Oprah says it. Kobe said it. The Bible, Buddha, and Lao Tzu, too.

But dreaming can be a difficult task when life is moving at the speed of light.

The moment you slow down, the voices flood in: the shouldas, couldas, wouldas.

They drown you and make dreaming feel like a privilege.

I'm someone who can hold multiple ideas in my head at once. I can see five different futures and find the light in all of them. It's hard to let go of multiple dreams, especially when I'm holding on to what an old version of me once wanted.

That's not entirely a gift, because at some point, clarity requires loss. Like holding onto clothes that haven't fit in years because you swear you'll get back to that size, it's hard, but we have to let it go, sweet pea. Besides, 9/10, you've outgrown that style.

If you have a few minutes, try this:

1. Jot down all the dreams that are floating around.

2. Read them aloud.

3. Cross off all that are no longer aligned.

   
   

And if you're still confused, it might be time to clarify some key terms.

Elizabeth Gilbert once wrote about the difference between a hobby, a job, a career, and a vocation (Link).

Not everything needs to be everything, but confusing these terms will keep you stuck longer than necessary.

Hobby — What you do for joy. Right now, it's my bees. A friend of mine bird watches. My mother does puzzles.

Job — What you do for money. The thing that pays the bills.

Career — Something you build over the years with energy, passion, and commitment.

Vocation — What you're called to do. A soul agreement between you and divinity.

And sometimes you need someone (or something) to reflect you back to you.

Put your dreams into ChatTisha or Claudette (my friend Tahirah's names for ChatGPT and Claude) and ask: "What is the common thread here?"

Once you see it, you have to move.

Watch Ian Hacon's TEDx talk on how to DREAM big and achieve your goals: https://youtu.be/zb9SPfgvPyo?si=gLdYbVvgEVUGtIgY

See you next week. 🥂